JOLENE HUI

You blow, Stephanie Meyer.

2011-10-26T19:15:00.000-07:00

As I was driving home today I couldn't help but notice the massive, Godzilla-sized Breaking Dawn Part I poster at Hollywood and Highland. The vomit almost came up, but I successfully kept it down - barfing while driving in LA (or anywhere for that matter) could cause a car crash.

I will admit that when the books first came out I was interested in them and hung my "Team Jacob" patch up at my desk. I would even go so far as to say I enjoyed reading Breaking Dawn. It's the book in the trilogy with the most action. I love easy reads. I'm the romance novel master (mistress)! However, once I saw that ginormous money making monster was not just a fun silly story, I began to think twice about the series. To some girls (and middle aged women) Bella is their idol and the luckiest character alive! I mean, she met her true love in high school, had two hot guys fighting over her, and chose immortal life with the pale bloodsucking one (should have chosen the dark hotter one). Wait, hold up, what? Ok, so this young girl falls "in love" with some vampire who has been alive for a zillion years and he's not considered a total pervert? Isn't he a little old to be preying upon a high school girl? And, c'mon, is it at all plausible that he would just absolutely REFUSE to have sex with her until she marries him? What is this? 19 fucking 50? Not that I'm condoning teen sex (oh yeah, Edward isn't a teen but you get the idea), but that's just the reality, people. Oh wait, I forgot this is fantasy, right? And girls in fantasies don't have minds of their owns. Because it would have been unthinkable for Bella to have a mind of her own, go to college, and go to med school (or go into some other profession.. really, any profession), ditching the vampire pervert in the dust. It's just plain sad that any kind of woman would look up to a character like Bella. She's not even written as a fully formed character. It's obvious that she's some two-dimensional character written by a woman who, quite possibly, never got to live the life she wanted to lead so she pathetically penned her adolescent fantasy and made millions (billions) off of it.

Let's be honest, Stephanie Meyer is not that great of a writer. Her writing is probably on par with most seventh graders (newspapers write at a fifth grade level so maybe I'm being generous). And the fact that her massive fortune is probably tithed to a "church" that spent an enormous chunk of funds to take away civil rights in California (remember Prop 8?!?), gives me an even more bitter taste in my mouth.

I'm not saying to cover your daughter's (or mom's) eyes. I'm saying you should make them aware of what they're watching and why it absolutely sucks. Teach your women to be strong, to have character, to nourish their brains and be someone. I'm absolutely certain that women can do this while at the same time falling in love and having a family. We're more than just flat pieces of cardboard.

(If you want to watch the movie to see that hottie Taylor Lautner, I fully support you.)

KENNA'S VIRGO out!!!

2011-08-22T20:20:00.000-07:00

My story, "KENNA'S VIRGO" was released last week by Torquere Press.
It's only $2.99 on their site! GO GET IT!!!

xoxo

Fiction without the erotic

2011-07-21T20:35:00.000-07:00

I forgot how emotionally draining it can be to write fiction. And when I say fiction I am meaning without the erotic. I just completed one of the first just-plain-ol-literary-fiction stories I've written in a long time. And it was rough. In fact, it made me completely grumpy and emotional. Based on a dream I had last week, the story ate away at me until I typed it out. I wanted to turn the images into something completely feminist and something influenced by both Mary Caponegro and Kafka. Something that dealt with gender, love, transformation, appearances, and what it means to be alive. After probably four days or so of writing, I finished it.

There have been some erotic stories I've penned that have taken a lot out of me ("Parker's Mustache," "A Million Camilles," "The Summer of Bobby") but never like this story. I'm not sure what it means. All I know is that finishing it and having my husband read and edit it was completely cathartic and necessary.

Hopefully one day I can find a home for it.

Enjoying the heat?

2011-07-08T14:01:00.000-07:00

Holy cannoli it's been hot outside!

After a lovely trip to New England, I've been inside (where it's cool) working on editing a lengthy 35-page story for Torquere Press. It's part of the Sapphic Planet line of zodiac stories we're publishing with Torquere. As you can see in the pic, my Sphynx rather enjoys writing and editing lesbian erotica as well. Well, he IS my son, after all.

I'll be sticking around inside to do more writing. I'll keep you posted on any new happenings in this area. Hopefully you've picked up Cole Riley's, "Too Much Boogie" and have read my story, "The Summer of Bobby."

Keep it cool!

xoxo

a note

2011-06-08T15:04:00.000-07:00

I have not slept since I read House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski.

That was over two years ago.

AWARD WINNING!

2011-04-28T08:15:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning to read that the anthology, "To Love and to Cherish" won an award! That's right, it was the 2010 Lesbian Fiction Readers Choice favorite anthology. <3 <3
I am so pleased and honored to have been included in this collection with so many top authors.
Congrats to my fellow authors! And to everyone who hasn't checked out the collection, please do so! All proceeds go to MARRIAGE EQUALITY.

You can find it on amazon or on the publisher's site directly - LOVE YOU DIVINE - There's even a free read option so you can test it out before you purchase. I encourage you do download at least one volume to check out the stories. My story, My Doris, My Love, is in volume 1: On Bended Knee.

I LOVE hearing this kind of news!!!

LAXposed - Friday 2-4pm!!!

2011-04-21T10:17:00.001-07:00

Musings of a new bride...

2011-01-21T17:16:00.000-08:00

The glow has not worn off yet. My honey and I got hitched less than a week ago and I am still feeling the wedding love, which is not surprising since I've loved him for nearly seven years now. I guess I'm just feeling lucky that I found someone who is so perfect for me. Someone so supportive and someone who balances me out. We have everything I could ever want in a relationship. Considering all of the bad relationships I've seen, heard about, and been through, it's almost a miracle that this happened! I cherish him, us, and our kitty. I can't wait for our family to grow.......

I find it weird that some people seem taken aback by the fact that I did not and will not change my name. It is 2011 - not 1911. I fully support women changing their names and even more fully support men and women who change their names together! But it just wasn't for us. I did a little reading up on the whole name change thing before our nuptials. In the United States, women used to not be able to keep their names because they were seen as property. Wives=property. Blech. To me, my name is part of my identity. I'm not my husband's property. I'm his partner. I've had my name for 31 years and I don't think it's appropriate for me to change it. I'm just not that archaic. Because women fought so hard to keep their identities (birth names) in the late 1800s and early 1900s, I am going to keep mine not only to respect their struggle - but because it's the right thing for me to do.

Here's a little info on the Lucy Stone League: a tough group of ladies named after Lucy Stone, the first documented woman to keep her birth name - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucy_Stone_League

Just call me a Lucy Stoner!

Some women like to say they changed their name because they want their children to have their last name...well, for most of my life my mother has had a different name than I have and I didn't mind it at all. As I said, it's 2011 - there are blended families now. There's no such thing as a "traditional family" anymore and, fuck, I'm glad. That being said, my future children will have their father's last name - don't want to bog them down with too many names. I mean, my feline son has his father's last name, so my human kids will be given that name as well. :-)

Speaking of feline son...he is chewing at my sweatshirt and licking my hand right now.
Gotta go!!!

Special Holiday Gift Ideas for your Honey...

2010-11-25T17:33:00.000-08:00

Just in time for Black Friday, here's my list of ideal holiday gifts for your sugar pie...
JOLENE'S SEXY HOLIDAY GIFT RECOMMENDATIONS
Sometimes it's difficult to come up with things on your own - Good Vibrations is a good place to start! They have a plethora of gifts - books, toys, gifts & games.....take your pick.

Have fun shopping tomorrow!
xoxo

Free Entertainment!

2010-11-15T19:05:00.000-08:00

I know I've robbed everyone of my sensual writing by not ever having anything available for free. As you all know, most of my erotic lit is available in print. Time are tough and everyone needs a good bedtime story. So...if you're broke and need a fix, I would like to introduce you to a writer named Joseph. He's recently had three sizzling stories published online at Good Vibrations Magazine at http://magazine.goodvibes.com/.

Here's the link to his latest story, The Closet: http://magazine.goodvibes.com/2010/11/15/the-closet/
At the bottom you can click on the link to all postings by this wonderful writer. My personal favorite is Weekly Dress-Up.

When you're there, be sure to peruse the site. Good Vibrations is a wonderful organization that has been around forever. They're a good resource for sexual education and products! Take a gander at their online store - that's the kind of online shopping I recommend.

xoxo
Until Next time!

Sex Tips From Yours Truly

2010-10-14T11:31:00.001-07:00

This is my first venture into "non-fiction" sex writing. I'm very excited to be blogging with Good Vibrations Magazine and trying something new. For those of you who are lucky enough to live in a city with a Good Vibrations store, you know the extent of their awesomeness. If I want to write a how-to book someday, I better get this advising role down. I'm definitely bossy enough to embrace this kind of role. And I love writing about sex, so I guess I'm in luck!

Take a break from work and read it!

KEEP IT SEXY WHILE IN GRAD SCHOOL

Thanks for reading!

xoxo

THE MARILYN PHASE also available on Amazon!

2010-09-26T15:49:00.000-07:00

If you have a kindle - in addition to downloading The Marilyn Phase from the publisher's site (loveyoudivine.com), you can get it while it's hot on AMAZON.COM!

Perfect reading material for work or school!

Buy my work!!!

2010-09-10T11:29:00.000-07:00

Buy my new hot story,

THE MARILYN PHASE

on the publisher's website! It's my FIRST solo release so I'm very excited. I am hoping to write for loveyoudivine in the future.

Please Please Please download it!

xoxo

Solo Release September 8, 2010!

2010-08-24T10:35:00.000-07:00

My first solo release comes out September 8, 2010!
Loveyoudivine alterotica is releasing it as an e-story which will be available on their site and other outlets.
The story, The Marilyn Phase, is about a woman's summer fling in Palm Springs.
My love of Marilyn Monroe inspired this sizzling 40-page tale.
More details will follow...the where whens whys and hows....
Just wanted to share the exciting news!

xoxo

INTERVIEW at the Logical Lust Blog

2010-03-26T14:07:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone! I'm here to direct you to the Logical Lust blog at

http://logicallust.wordpress.com/

to read my interview!

!!!

xoxo

The COUGAR BOOK coming Valentine's Day!

2010-02-07T17:26:00.000-08:00

Still looking for a gift for your loved one? Still looking for a gift for yourself?

You're in luck. Oh so much sultry older female younger male luck...

THE COUGAR BOOK will be available in print and ebook on Valentine's Day!!

http://www.logical-lust.com/cougar.html

From the same editor, Jolie du Pre, and publishing company , Logical-Lust, who brought you SWING! - THE COUGAR BOOK has an amazing lineup of fantastic and well-known erotica authors.

I encourage you to indulge in some chocolate and cougars this lovers day. ;-)

Welcome to my stop on the TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH blog tour!

2010-01-30T00:00:00.000-08:00

Thanks for stopping by my blog on this special day - my blog is the tour site for Saturday, January 30! I wish I could feed all of you special cupcakes and hot chocolate but I can't really serve you through your computer monitor.

As a lead up to the entire collection of "TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH," publisher loveyoudivine Alterotica is releasing three e-books before the print version comes out on February 14, 2010 - Valentine's Day! My story, "MY DORIS, MY LOVE," is part of the first e-book entitled, "ON BENDED KNEE" (released January 29).

This is probably one of my most romantic stories and definitely the only one I've ever written with a proposal in it. I'm assuming this isn't a spoiler for most people as the title of the e-book sort of gives it away, eh? I tell the story of Lark and Doris, a long-time couple who become engaged. As a romantic, I always think about weddings and the proposals that lead to weddings. Also, I think, I've always wanted a lovely romantic wedding proposal so writing about a proposal is in some way satisfying for me - just as writing sex scenes is satisfying. I passionately believe that anyone should be able to get married regardless of sexual orientation. That's what inspired me to write the story. Heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual - everyone deserves the right to wedded bliss. Love is love -regardless of gender.

Here's an excerpt from my story:

“So how was your day?” A typical question in a not so typical situation made me giggle.

“It was long. Very long.” I worked as a lifestyle editor for a daily paper. Luckily for me, I just worked days. My assistant editors worked early morning and night shifts for me. Doris worked as a nurse in a pediatrician’s office. We had very different jobs. Our polar opposite careers always made for good after work conversation.

“I had a writer insist on writing a story on muffins,” I said. “She explained that they are one of the most important breakfast breads. And since breakfast is the most important meal, it’s only logical for it to be a feature.”

Doris laughed, her body shaking the water.

“Marion Mitchell brought her son in again. This time he sprained his wrist. Kid can’t stop jumping off roofs and falling out of trees.”

I tilted back in the tub, lifting my feet up and placing them on Doris’ shoulders. It was a big tub and we weren’t big people-another reason I loved being with Doris.

She began to massage my right foot, hitting all the right points in my arch. I immediately relaxed, sliding deeper into the bathtub. As she worked her way through my tense feet I tilted my head back and let her work her magic. Up my legs she went, massaging. The knots in my body melted off one by one in rapid succession.

Her body slid closer and my yoga flexibility helped twist us into a comfortably sexy position in the bathtub. My muscles relaxed like a mass of goo. Her fingers stopped kneading and, instead, moved along my shoulders lightly. Fingertips swept across my wet shoulders and down my arms under the water. Her fingers disappeared into the water,
“Eeeks.” I almost wiggled when her fingertips touched my inner thighs.

“Shhhhhh,” she said. “It’s quiet time now.”

I put my hand over my mouth to keep the giggles from escaping.

......................

Thank you for stopping by my blog for this sneak peak! May you be blessed with much love in your life. I am extremely proud that all of our proceeds will go to a worthy cause, Marriage Equality. xoxoxoxo

ADDITIONAL INFO:

The other two e-book volumes come out on February 5th (WITH THIS RING) and February 12th (LIVES AND WIVES) before the print edition is released on the day of love!

Here are a couple of places you can find them:

ALL ROMANCE and LOVEYOUDIVINE

The book is written by the Sapphic Planet writers - http://www.sapphicplanet.com

The book is published by loveyoudivine - http://www.loveyoudivine.com

All proceeds go to Marriage Equality USA - http://www.marriageequality.org

Happy 2010! "On Bended Knee" out soon!

2010-01-03T20:15:00.000-08:00

I'm sooooo excited to start 2010 off with a story in Volume 1 of To Love and To Cherish, published by Love You Divine and written by the Sapphic Planet Writers. On January 29, my story, My Doris, My Love, will be released in this first volume aptly titled, On Bended Knee. Two more volumes of e-novellas will follow. Finally, on February 14th (VALENTINE'S DAY!) all three will be compiled into a print edition of the book.

The anthology is about lesbian love and marriage and will benefit the cause for equal marriage rights for all. All proceeds will go to charity (I can't remember what one off the top of my head but will report later), so I'm hoping everyone will contribute to this worthy cause.

I will be appearing online in a couple of places to promote this project - more info to follow.

This may actually set me off to write some more romantic stories in the new year. I'm feeling lovey dovey.

xoxo

MAKING THE HOOK-UP in March 2010!

2009-11-15T19:46:00.000-08:00

Yes, my friends - I have a new story set to be published in March 2010! I know it's months off, but it'll be upon us before you know it. And hey, after you settle down from all the Valentine's excitement, you'll need something to get you all revved up for the Spring. Nothing like some "edgy sex with soul" to pick you up from your sugar crash. This will be my first time working with Cole Riley - wow, what a sexy name!

If you'd like to pre-order or just check out the details you can go to AMAZON.COM.

I'm only a couple months away from my first HALF MARATHON. I know I'll be able to finish it...just not sure how quick I'll be...

xoxo

SHRIEKFEST 2009 - Yippee Skippee

2009-10-11T21:21:00.000-07:00

Are my eyes closed in this picture? haha! Whatever, I had a great time at the fest this year. Tim and I saw some good flicks - short and feature length. I was a sponsor this year and am planning on sponsoring again next year. Please check out our write up!

TIM AND JOLENE GO TO SHRIEKFEST

Hope you're planning your Halloween costumes. As for me, well, I'm actually thinking about Christmas decorations already. Call me crazy.

GO BRUINS!

2009-09-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

THANK YOU, SEATTLE!

2009-09-07T18:50:00.000-07:00

Tim and I just returned from our trip to the Pacific Northwest. I'd like to send a big thanks to the folks at the Center for Positive Sex Culture in Seattle for welcoming me to read at their Spoken Word night at PARADISE UNBOUND 2009. I had a great time reading from both OPEN FOR BUSINESS and ULTIMATE LESBIAN EROTICA 2009. Although I couldn't see the crowd (it was late at night and we were at a campsite!), I could hear them responding. It was so refreshing to breathe in that clean, crisp, air. Ahhhhhhhh.....

The pic above is courtesy of Tim. Kind of Amsterdam-y, eh?

Also, I'd like to thank the Famous Mysterious Actor show in Portland for providing us with some quality entertainment in Portland. I had a headache when I left the theatre but was glad to have been part of the candy-throwing extravaganza. Portland had one of the best parts about our trip - music videos at Valentine's. My Marilyn Manson pick closed out the night very well for everyone. Hopefully a few nightmares were had thanks to yours truly.

I was happy to stop by a few local bookstores and sign any anthologies on their shelves that included my work. Speaking of those bookstores, Powell's was one of the best bookstores I've ever had the pleasure to visit. I bought a few books and a fantastic vintage LOLITA poster that I'm going to have to frame and hang up at my desk.

Thought I'd throw in the pic below since I AM that kind of writer. It's my attempt at being artistic.

Cheers to everyone! HAPPY LABOR DAY!!

COIL TATTOO GALLERY OPENING IN CHINATOWN!

2009-08-25T12:54:00.000-07:00

What you see here is a seashell tattoo done by the marvelous Nathan Kostechko. He is also the master behind the work done on my arms. This piece is the beginning of a Pygmalion and Galatea theme. Pygmalion showered Galatea with tons of gifts, shells being just one of the many lovely items. I'd like to have the story done on the right side of my back connecting to the Apple of Discord on my right arm.

This is why I'm so thrilled that Nathan is opening a shop in Chinatown! It's not officially open yet but he is taking appointments. You can get in touch with him through the COIL website at www.coiltattoogallery.com or his personal site www.nathankostechko.com (I think they go to the same place right now). It's in a really convenient location and it's comfortable. I'm just super stoked that he's back in LA!

I'm glad I got this seashell out of the way because the tattooing on my butt hurt worse than any other tattooing I've ever had. Good God. And today I feel like I'm walking funny because it's starting to scab over. Not sure how I'm going to be able to run while it's healing!!

PARADISE UNBOUND

2009-08-19T11:00:00.000-07:00

I'm sure some of you are wondering what I'm doing in my pre-school time off from employment. You're thinking- she's just sitting on a chair staring at a wall with her hair unbrushed. Aha! You are wrong! Although I DO spend plenty of time doing that (I never brush my hair), I am also going to be doing some work.

I'll be up in Seattle on Thursday September 3rd headlining the Spoken Word Night portion of Paradise Unbound. Paradise Unbound is a camp out put on by the Center for Positive Sex Culture. Check out the link for more details.

http://www.paradiseunbound.com/

Now I just need to figure out what to read....

The most confusing experience

2009-08-05T19:04:00.000-07:00

Wow. I don't even know what to say. I am so confused right now. Wednesdays, for the past six weeks, have been my Beverly Hills community ed yoga nights. Tonight was supposed to be the last class. I marched out of the house with my yoga mat saying to Tim, "I don't really feel like going to yoga tonight but I should." Deep down inside I knew it would make me feel better and, of course, relax me. It always does. I love yoga. I was just feeling a little lazy.

When I entered the yoga room, there were three other women besides me. Our teacher wasn't there. Instead, I noticed a young ethnic woman practicing her dance moves in front of the mirror. I thought she might have just stopped off to use the mirrors or something and paid no attention. I laid out my mat and got the blankets ready. The other women did the same thing. Our regular teacher never showed. Instead, the dancing gal turned on loud music and started shouting at us to move heads and stretch our necks. She continued barking orders for stretches that were more like aerobics stretches. My face showed my deep confusion. When she yelled at us to plie down to the ground I looked over to see the older women attempt it. It was sad. Keep in mind that not only is this class community education, it's "adult" community education, meaning a lot of senior citizens take part. There were only four of us in the class and only half of us could do what she was ordering us to do. When one woman questioned, "are these yoga stretches?" She answered very firmly, "every stretch is a yoga stretch."

Whoa. Hold up. I've done enough yoga in my time to know that this is NOT true. And doing yoga to hip hop, soul, and The Police really does not work for me.

Apparently I wasn't the only one it didn't work for because the oldest woman left the class with me about five minutes into it. I had to borrow her phone to call Tim to come get me.

My brain is still in shock. What the f*** just happened?

SWING! now in print!

2009-07-01T07:38:00.001-07:00

Even during troubled times we know one positive thing is certain - people have sex.

Join in the fun and read about it, too!

SWING! (formerly only available as an e-book) is now in print. It's available various places online including the Logical-Lust website, Barnes and Noble, and Amazon.

So if you like doing things the old fashioned way, jump on this. You won't regret reading 25 swingalicious stories....

xoxo

Rest in peace, Michael...

2009-06-27T12:41:00.000-07:00

One of my first memories is when the video for THRILLER first came out. It scared me so much that I told my parents I never wanted to see it again. They laughed and told me they were gonna hold my eyelids open with toothpicks and make me watch it over and over again. I was only 3 or 4 years old. They were such jerks! Thanks a lot, parents (I'll send my therapy bills to you).

The rest of my Michael Jackson memories are happy. My parents were both really into good music and formed my listening tastes early on. They were both fans (obviously). I remember my mother doing aerobics to Jackson 5 music. Then, for some reason, my sister and I got a hold of a MOONWALKER VHS and proceeded to watch it probably every day (at least once). Every time the ROCK WITH YOU segment came on, I'd get all flushed and worked up. "Ohmygodheissohot!!!!!!!" I'd shriek. Sometimes I'd rewind it. I've pasted a screenshot from that video below so you can see what got my 9 year old hormones going. My sister, four and a half years younger, fell instantly in love with MJ - to the point where she'd kiss her poster of him.

My sister reminded me that our little brother used to dance around to BLACK OR WHITE when it came out. Basically, we all loved all of his music at any point in his career. His videos were more than videos and his dancing was, well, uh, extremely awesome!! The best entertainer I've ever seen. Everywhere he performed girls would get hysterical and faint. Now that's charisma!

My boyfriend has a theory that people cannot help but dance or at least move around a little to DON'T STOP TIL YOU GET ENOUGH. His theory was proven when we were in Chicago about four years ago. We were on the trolley headed somewhere when that song came on. Every single person in the trolley started groovin'. It was an amusing sight.

Over these past few days it has been really great to see everyone from all around the world mourn the loss of such an icon. I know he meant a lot to many generations.

I have been listening to his DANGEROUS album yesterday and today and I have to say, it is fucking amazing. I'm sure my neighbors enjoyed my renditions of WHO IS IT and GIVE IN TO ME. All of his music is timeless. OFF THE WALL is still amazing and 300 times better than music today. Everyone knows THRILLER went platinum like 20 times and I always loved BAD. The thing about DANGEROUS I'm noticing is how mature it is - it has a passion about it that I never fully realized before. I will perform it many more times in my apartment in remembrance of such an unforgettable entertainer.

Thanks for all the memories, MJ - we're gonna miss you!!!!!

Oh so leggy!!

2009-06-20T20:04:00.000-07:00

Here is one of the photos from the shoot I recently did with Los Angeles based photographer Christina Padilla. I really inherited my mother's legs. I'll post more pics as I sort through them.

I got word that the book Swing! that is currently in e-book form is going to be in print soon!

The boyfriend and I did 14 loads of laundry today. And watched Orgazmo. All in a days work, my friends. All in a days work...

xoxo

Hot Summer Sexy Time at IN THE FLESH

2009-06-03T20:05:00.000-07:00

It's time for you to get excited. Why? Because I will be reading at Hustler next week, Wednesday, June 10th, at IN THE FLESH. The theme this month is Hot Summer Sex and I am pleased to be reading an excerpt from my story The Salsa Bar that's featured in Alison Tyler's book, Playing With Fire.

As usual, Stan Kent will be DJing and there will be giveaways of Hustler Merchandise and some goodie samples. Remember, there is free parking behind the store at 8920 W. Sunset Blvd, West Hollywood, CA 90069 (310)-860-9009 - See you there!

Thought I'd include this too cute pic of me and my sis on her wedding day. I think it's one of my favorite pics ever taken.

I'm in "GOOD" and my hair looks damn good

2009-05-22T18:34:00.000-07:00

Happy Memorial Day Weekend!

Proof that I work

2009-05-20T20:43:00.000-07:00

Proof that I work - even though the first pic shows me eating a dumpster of an ice cream sundae that made me sick the rest of the night. Or maybe that was the Ducks losing so badly that made me lose my dairy until 4:30 am. Until next season...

Both photos by HAPPY PHOTOS in Costa Mesa, CA

2008 Lesbian Fiction Readers Choice Awards!

2009-05-17T18:19:00.000-07:00

The winners for the 2008 Lesbian Fiction Readers Choice Awards were recently announced and I am very happy to report that I am in one of the favorite anthologies chosen!

2008 Favorite Anthology:

A Little Book of Big Christmas Tales - Anne Azel

Best Lesbian Love Stories 2009 - Simone Thorne (editor)

Chilling Tales of Terror and the Supernatural - Patty G. Henderson (editor)

Island Girls - Simone Thorne (editor)

Toe to Toe: Standing Tall and Proud - C Tierney (editor)

Wetter - Nicole Foster (editor)

My story "A Weekend in Santa Monica" is in Simone Thorne's Best Lesbian Love Stories 2009.

The entire list can be found HERE.

Sugar Overdose at the Ducks Game! (and some Fango, too)

2009-05-08T08:21:00.000-07:00

It's almost the weekend - and God, I hope so because I made a fatal error yesterday that I would like to forget. That's right, I accidentally wore a red sweater to the Ducks v. Red Wings game last night. I'm such an idiot! Not only that, there was an argument with the cops (will not go into detail) and I seemed to get hassled all night. Let's just say it was a bad night overall for pretty much everything.

Read about it here:
JOLENE'S TAKE ON GAME FOUR OF THE ANAHEIM V DETROIT SERIES

Just because you know you want to read it, here's a recap of this year's Fangoria convention last month! And like the hard worker I am, I asked someone else to write my column for me! Eh, he did a better job anyway. He and the werewolf look very happy together.

Take a look:
THE TIM REAPER TAKES OVER PRINCESS JOLENE'S COLUMN

Have a fantastic weekend and I'll try not to melt in the heat. It's not summer yet but it certainly smells like it.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I get to be all artsy and stuff!!!

2009-04-30T19:47:00.001-07:00

Hey, quit looking at that zipper, you pervert! Who woulda thunk I'd be a part of a juried literary showcase? Well, I AM a northwestern girl at heart so it makes sense that I am one of nine authors showcased this weekend at the SEATTLE EROTIC ART FESTIVAL.

Sure, I never lived out my dream of going to University of Washington and working in a coffee shop, but that doesn't mean my dirty writings can't grace the city.

My friend Jeremy Edwards also made it into the showcase! He's a stellar writer and I am pleased to be in such good company.

According to the SEAF website, this festival was founded in 2002 by The Foundation for Sex Positive Culture to promote freedom of sexuality, speech, and creativity through the erotic expression of fine art.

Thanks to Dr. Dick for pointing out this opportunity.

SWING! Adventures in Swinging - Blog Tour!

2009-04-19T20:08:00.000-07:00

Happy Monday, everyone! I am so thrilled to be the April 20th stop of the blog tour for Swing! edited by the talented Jolie du Pre. My answers are quick and dirty (like I like it). The book is being released THIS WEEK on Friday, April 24th and it's an honor to share pages with some of the finest of today's erotica writers. Check the website for more details.

1. Why do you write erotica and what do you love best about it?

The number one reason I write erotica is, well, I love sex. Of course, I love writing fiction, too, so it just seems logical to combine the two. The thing I love best about writing in this genre is being able to convey sex in such a positive way when we live in a society that loves it but doesn’t want to admit it because it still sees it as something dirty and taboo.

2. Tell us about your story in Swing! Adventures in Swinging by Today's Top Erotica Writers and please feel free to give us an excerpt.

My story, “Quick Fix” is about a couple (Luke and Lara) that needs to spice up their relationship so they swing with a couple next door. The whole thing starts when Kevin, the neighbor, knocks on the Lara’s door and asks to borrow some kool-aid. I seem to like to write about attractive neighbors. Maybe I have a secret desire to have sex with my neighbors.

Here’s an excerpt:

He led me through the hallway to his bedroom. It was obvious an artist lived here as about 20 canvases hung on the walls. Kevin pointed to one on the wall opposite the door. It was a woman, her back exposed, a hand placed on the pale curve of her back.

I walked closer. Her hair was the exact dark brown shade of mine. The rest of the colors were vivid, yet calming.

“Do you like it?” He asked. I felt him standing right behind me, his breath almost on my neck.

“It’s beautiful. It really is.” I turned around slowly. With my heels on we were almost eye-to-eye. His hand reached around to touch the small of my back, his eyes, locked on mine. The right side of his mouth turned up in a smile, the dimple a delectable indentation on his face. I held my breath, trying not to smell his aftershave. I could hear Luke and Missi still laughing in the other room. They sounded so far away.

I felt like there was a magnet in me, tipping me off my heels into him. His fingers seared a hole in my back. I almost moaned. His lips brushed mine delicately, barely gripping my top lip before he released it. The fingers on my back pushed me forward to lead him out of the bedroom. My breath started to slow when I saw Luke pouring Missi a glass of wine.

3. Name some other books where we can find your work.

Some of my favorite erotic books where you can find my work are Playing with Fire edited by Alison Tyler, A is for Amour edited by Alison Tyler, J is for Jealousy edited by Alison Tyler, Iridescence edited by Jolie du Pre and Ultimate Lesbian Erotica edited by Nicole Foster. I’m also in a couple of fantastic literary fiction anthologies, Tonto Short Stories and More Tonto Short Stories.

You can find the complete list on my website at www.jolenehui.com. You’ll also find links to my work on Inside Hockey and The Flesh Farm.

4. What are you working on now?

I’m trying to get a foot fetish story going but really I’m working on a lot of different things. I always am in the middle of a million short pieces. And I’m relieved that I’ve finally found inspiration to work on a novel – it’s a memoir…sort of. It’s as good of a memoir as I can do.

5. If you could offer one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?

Whenever I’m asked to give advice to writers I just like to say keep writing. That’s really the most important thing for all writers to remember. Also, ENJOY IT! It should be a fun and worthwhile process.

Pigeon Poo

2009-04-13T20:39:00.000-07:00

It is true that the USPS is after me. Not only did they neglect to track a piece of important certified mail, they aren't too keen on delivering my sister's personalized bridal shower invitations to me. This is why I pay my bills online. Remember when they were lovely enough to hold my mail (without informing me) for two weeks? Yeah, there was that incident. Plus there was that time when items from The Flesh Farm archive were lost and, oh yeah, that time when I thought my postal carrier was reading my porn.

The only pieces of mail I got today were bad news. Bad news on top of a damn annoying Monday do not cheer me up. Even a pigeon thought it was a "shit on Jolene" day when he dribbled a bit of poo onto my leg as I ate my sandwich outside on my lunch hour.

The only thing I have to look forward to this evening is a bubble bath, a heating pad to relax my neck and shoulder muscles, and the sweet hum of my television. The day just needs to stop.

On a cheerier note, my blog interview is getting closer. So on the 20th, please come back here as I will be the featured author from Jolie du Pre's SWING! on that day.

As of now I've been writing for hours, but ate a brownie and did a video chat with my boyfriend to break up the process. Tomorrow night I look forward to a 10K jog and American Idol.

Thank God for Lionel Richie radio on Pandora and Thank God for ebay jewelry.

Let's hope tomorrow is lovelier....

I like free tickets - who doesn't?

2009-04-03T08:32:00.000-07:00

I'm on INSIDE HOCKEY today (www.insidehockey.com) talking about my trip to the Staples Center to see two evil teams.

Direct Link to it:
http://www.insidehockey.com/columns/3430

Keep reading for more info on upcoming fun times. IN THE FLESH coming up next Wednesday at Hustler and a blog tour stop at THIS BLOG on April 20th for "Swing!"

I'm running a race this weekend. Wish me luck!

xoxo

En Espanol! Si! Si! Si!

2009-03-24T18:20:00.000-07:00

Did I tell you one of my stories was translated into Spanish? Amusing, right? Alison Tyler's The Happy Birthday Book of Erotica is available now in Spanish! I'm so thrilled...but bummed I haven't seen a copy yet. The above pic was the best I could do, size-wise. I couldn't find a larger version, damnit.

CLICK HERE FOR ONE OF THE MANY PLACES TO FIND THIS SEXY BOOK

Speaking of sexy - if you were planning on going to The Hive Gallery this Friday for the Feminine Oddities show, I won't be there. Just letting you know in case you'd been planning to see this particular burlesque show. Go see a movie instead. I Love You Man, looks fantastic.

Love you all!

A very lucky stylish baby!

2009-03-18T10:25:00.000-07:00

I ordered this cute ANAHEIM DUCKS oneside for a gal I work with in San Francisco. There's going to be a very adorable little Ducks fan in the bay area soon!!!

If I ever have kids, they'll be wearing Ducks logo emblazoned clothing. You better believe it.

PLAYING WITH FIRE looks hot 'n spicy SPECTACULAR

2009-03-17T15:26:00.000-07:00

My copies of PLAYING WITH FIRE arrived today and they look amazing. I could stare at the cover all day!!! SO SEXY (see cover in previous post)

I don't think it's available to the public yet so don't get too excited. If you want to pre-order, go for it - it's worth it. These stories are spicy.

Product Description

Why should you play hard to get when you can play with fire? The forbidden has never been so appealing as it is in Alison Tyler's latest collection. In these incendiary stories that explore the taboo side of erotica, couples go about setting their boundaries aflame. Committed to each other without question, they play out their naughtiest fantasies, pushing the limits of sex, lust, and the imagination as far as they can to please each other. Playing it a bit riskier and playing it a bit more daring will send readers and their partners steaming towards the next step in sexual exploration. Featuring new work from ADR Forte, Jolene Hui, Sommer Marsden, Shanna Germain, and others, Playing With Fire delivers enough heat to inspire readers to burn their own erotic bridges.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Keep it HOT
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Jolene

Come visit with me IN THE FLESH <3

2009-03-10T19:16:00.000-07:00

You should come to a FREE reading at Hustler-Hollywood
this Wednesday night at 8PM. That's TOMORROW NIGHT!

I'm co-hosting the next installation of LA's IN THE FLESH reading series.

And you know what's exciting? Three time Emmy winner Gordon Bressack
(Pinky & the Brain, Animaniacs) will be there to tell us how he didn't
lose his virginity. Also on the list for the evening - a fellow named
Jar, Stan Kent, and Rachel Kramer Bussel via phone (for the "phone
sex" segment).

Goodies from the Hustler cafe will be provided...

Hustler Hollywood
8920 Sunset Blvd
West Hollywood, CA 90069
Free Parking onsite!

TWO BOOKS COMING OUT!

2009-03-03T19:22:00.001-08:00

I can hardly wait for these two books to come out. Yippeeeee!!!

Swing! should be out (hopefully) mid-month and Playing With Fire is scheduled for the beginning of April.

DON'T FORGET- In The Flesh is next week at Hustler, Hollywood. Wednesday, March 11th. I'll be there co-hosting with Stan Kent. I've been trying to do a little recruiting on craigslist - but the aholes flagged and removed me again. I didn't even use the term "erotic" in the posting or mention anything to do with sex. Maybe I'm in the wrong category? WTF, CRAIGSLIST?! WTF?!?

Hey, at least I'm getting my mail now.

Huh? What?

2009-02-21T16:01:00.000-08:00

So why is it that my roommate and I haven't received mail in about a week? Weird. Very weird.

My landlord hasn't received any either.

Apparently the entire building is mail-free.

I WANT MY ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY.

I think Friday the 13th sucks

2009-02-09T20:54:00.001-08:00

I didn't see it but I waited 2 hours this evening for the premiere. I'm declaring that it sucks because I waited in the cold for jackasses to let in fellow jackasses who had been waiting all day. What the hell? Who waits all day for Friday the 13th? Get a job!

Interview with Dr. Dick - Part 2

2009-02-09T13:43:00.000-08:00

And now the exciting conclusion you've all been waiting for...

Here's the second part to my Dr. Dick interview:
http://www.drdicksexadvice.com/2009/02/09/podcast-98/

Today my quads and now shins are sore. I ran a very hilly 10K yesterday. I'd trained for it...but hadn't done hills that severe. Yowsah!

Interview with Dr. Dick - Part 1

2009-02-02T10:34:00.000-08:00

Last month I had the opportunity to sit down and chat with Dr. Dick. I answered some questions, did a little reading, and had a great time. I kicked my boyfriend out and my roommate had to go away, too...so now they can hear what I was up to when I made them disappear. Obviously I was up to no good, but they're used to that.

The first part of the interview is posted on Dr. Dick's site.
Here's the link:
http://www.drdicksexadvice.com/2009/02/02/podcast-97/

The second part is scheduled to go up next week....so stay tuned!

Here's a little about the Doc:

Richard Wagner, Ph.D., ACS. has been working in the sex field for over 25 years, predominately as a therapist. During that time he's been involved in all sorts of sex education and sexual enrichment projects.

One such outlet is the online sex advice column that he's been writing for the past 10 years. During that time it has been syndicated on a number of sites and in print. Two years ago he decided to create his own site to give his column and weekly podcasts a home of their own: http://www.drdicksexadvice.com/.

You can find out a little bit more about his background here: http://www.drdicksexadvice.com/hello-world/

He's also the president of Daddy Oohhh! Productions; Quality Adult Entertainment, Education and Enrichment, in Seattle. http://www.daddyoohhh.com/ He invites you to check out the About Us and Media Center links for our corporate philosophy.

Burlesque-ing about town

2009-01-22T21:59:00.000-08:00

I've got a couple of performances coming up next weekend. See the fabulous pics in the posting below?

On Friday, the 30th, Feminine Oddities is heading over to Infusion Gallery in downtown LA to shake our booties dressed as pirates. Yay! I get to play with a sword!

Saturday, the 31st, we get our own night at the Hive! Please see the press release below...

But before you do, let me say a couple (or 8) things about the fresh Oscar nominations.

1) Slumdog Millionaire was not that great

2) Kristin Scott Thomas was robbed. Not only was I've Loved You So Long an amazing movie, I've never seen acting that brilliant and natural.

3) Mickey Rourke fucking kicks ass. The Wrestler was an emotional experience for me.

4) Marisa Tomei still has a nice rack but was nothing special acting-wise.

5) I'm sick of reading about how the Dark Knight was robbed or some other lame shit like that. I was nearly asleep during the second half of that snoozefest.

6) However, Heath Ledger DID give a stellar performance.

8) I loved Milk.

That's it. Onto the release....and hope to see you next weekend! ;-)

*****************************************************************************

Feminine Oddities LLC

in association with

The Hive Gallery Presents:

"Mystery Box"

http://www.feminineoddities.com

Who:

Feminine Oddities LLC host the closing show at the Hive Gallery! It's a one night stand of art, music, and more titled "Mystery Box". Feminine Oddities LLC was formed by emerging artist and performer Debra Haden to showcase her many talents and the talents of others. The mission and inspiration of this company is derived from the term Wabi-Sabi. It's an understated beauty that is striking but not obvious, it is imperfect, incomplete and should be treasured because it will not last forever. Feminine Oddities "Where beauty is found in the oddest ways."

Feminine Oddities Artists:

Debra Haden, Joe Holliday, Christopher Moonlight, Nikki Windham, Donna Letterese, Mary Macker, Poppy Cannon Reese, Emily Steigerwald, and more……..

There will also be art-work from the talented Hive artists, and work from the recent Visionary Show!

Performances:

Music:

The 1921a: modern junkyard style band.

http://www.myspace.com/the1921a

Freaks:

Senor' Stretchy Skin, Damsella Distressed, and more TBA. Expect freaks, pain, and a strip tease like no other.

Burlesque:

Feminine Oddities performance "Shhhhhh!" Burlesque music box dancers in risqué situations.

www.feminineoddities.com

What:

It's another Feminine Oddities cocktail: "Mystery Box" What is worse than opening Pandora's Box?? Opening the Feminine Oddities Mystery Box!! Come have a peek, but be warned this isn't for the meek! This is a show themed around the fact that things are not always what they seem. Expect mysterious art-work, beautiful burlesque, and freaks galore. Come see the magic and mystery that happens when the Oddities raid the Hive for the night. Who knew the Oddities had a thing for honey?

When:

January 31st, 2009 doors open at 8pm- Midnight. Performances start at 9:00pm.

$8 at the door, $5 if dressed for Burlesque (corsets, fedoras etc)

Where:

The Hive Gallery

729 S. Spring St.

Los Angeles, CA 90014

www.thehivegallery.com

In the heart of downtown Los Angeles, the Hive has become one of the hottest galleries in town. With a large front gallery space full of featured artists works, a performance room, and the second half of the space for resident artists, it's no wonder there is such a buzz about the Hive Gallery!!

Photos with Feminine Oddities

2009-01-16T10:29:00.001-08:00

Feminine Oddities did a photoshoot with Heidi Calvert last night. Here is a little preview! We'll be performing at Infusion Gallery on the 30th and then at The Hive for a Feminine Oddities hosted show the next night on the 31st. More details to come.

I don't think I have the patience or energy tonight

2009-01-13T19:03:00.000-08:00

...yeah...don't think I have the energy to figure out how I want to tweak my layout. American Idol is on tonight and it's really my only night off. I've already stuffed myself full of fried rice (I made too much but ate it all anyway), got my car washed, and did a load of laundry. I also sent out a mass email to my list to let them know I'll be reading tomorrow night at HUSTLER HOLLYWOOD.

Let me say it again

I said TOMORROW NIGHT at...

Hustler Hollywood
8920 Sunset Blvd.
West Hollywood, CA 90069
310-860-9009

Now I need to figure out how the hell to add links to my blog so that I can send you to this place:
http://inthefleshreadingseriesla.blogspot.com/
without actually having to paste it below.

I blame it on rice on the brain.

Oh, I got a new little pink camera so I'll try to remember to take some pics tomorrow night to document the occasion.

BEVERLY HILLS

2008-07-07T20:20:00.000-07:00

PHOTOS BY CHRISTINA PADILLA

NAUGHTY NAUGHTY WABI SABI

2008-05-11T18:03:00.000-07:00

PHOTO BY JULIAN CHAN

STARECO PHOTOS- www.stareco.com

2008-05-11T17:54:00.000-07:00

PHOTOS BY DOMINIC QUAGLIOZZI

MY PRISON

2008-04-10T10:49:00.001-07:00

THE NEW YEAR

2008-01-10T22:52:00.000-08:00

LOUNGING AROUND

2007-11-01T01:22:00.001-07:00

MY BELOVED CITY

2007-09-10T22:28:00.000-07:00

MY ENVIRONMENT

2007-07-11T21:18:00.000-07:00

HANDS AND LEGS

2007-06-12T08:26:00.001-07:00

SUBWAY STOP

2007-05-01T08:31:00.000-07:00

SUNSET BOULEVARD

2007-04-10T17:23:00.000-07:00

HOLLYWOOD

2007-02-08T22:44:00.000-08:00

2007 Douglas Brooker

HEARTBREAK

2006-11-14T14:38:00.000-08:00

2006 Douglas Brooker

HEADSHOT AND RESUME

2006-07-26T21:32:00.000-07:00

2006-07-08T09:42:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker

2006-06-29T15:11:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker

2006-06-06T21:45:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker

2006-05-21T16:25:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker

2006-05-21T16:22:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker

2006-05-11T22:11:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker
I'm sitting outside in North Park, San Diego, but I feel like I'm in the swamps of Alabama.

2006-05-07T16:53:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker
It was a very overcast day. You wouldn't know it, would you?

2006-05-07T16:52:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker
Perched on a Tree in Balboa Park, San Diego. I feel like I'm going back to my Idaho roots.

2006-05-07T16:51:00.000-07:00

2006 Douglas Brooker
More photos in Balboa Park

2006-02-07T21:05:00.000-08:00

2006 Douglas Brooker
Another photo from the overcast day.

2005-11-06T11:58:00.001-08:00

2005 Douglas Brooker

2005-11-06T11:58:00.000-08:00

2005 Douglas Brooker
This is my "author" photo. I used it for my story that was published in Tonto Press Short Stories in February 2006.

2005-11-06T11:55:00.000-08:00

2005 Douglas Brooker

2005-11-06T11:54:00.000-08:00

2005 Douglas Brooker
This is my photo that made me a RUNNER UP in the FHM/Hard Case Crime "Paint My Dame" contest. I was one of the top 5 photos selected for this contest.

2005-11-06T11:53:00.000-08:00

2005 Douglas Brooker

2005-11-06T11:52:00.000-08:00

2005-11-06T11:50:00.000-08:00

The Cast of Sexual Perversity in Chicago - From Left: Christopher Duzan, Jolene Hui, Josh Short, Cristyn Chandler